Beg Your Pardon

I have so much I want to say, but I'm unsure of who I can talk to about it.

I really want to have a good gospel discussion. Totally geek out. No joke. I have been learning so much recently. Connecting dots, and I want to talk about it with someone. ...I just need to find that someone.

I have been so blessed recently. I know I've been bahumbugy the past...long while. I'm sorry. I've been dwelling on negative things I can't control. I know better. I'm going to try and change the tenor with this post.

On my really bad day (Friday), I got a Polo from my sister. My three-year-old nephew was wearing his bomber jacket and airplane shirt I gave him for Christmas, in addition to the aviator sunglasses he just got, and he told his mom, "I'm going to go fly my plane to get Rinny and bring her to grandma's house. Then we can go see her." ...She had no idea how rough my day was. I couldn't even send a video back because then she'd know I'd been crying. But hearing my nephew say that...and then I got a polo of him singing "Shut Up and Dance with Me" as he washed his hands...it was such a tender mercy. I love that little guy, he often makes my day.

I have also had so many opportunities to serve, and it's been really fun.

Today has been the best, however. So much learning happening today at church--hence why I need to find someone to talk to--and then Courtney, this guy from my ward, and I went to the temple afterwards. I took some pictures, and wrote quite a bit in my journal...still have a lot more to write though.

We got home, and I made some more cards to send to people while my roommate took a nap, and the day concluded with a devotional with Elder D. Todd Christofferson. ...Again, so much learning! I wrote some more in my journal, but I really want to talk about this stuff with someone. OH! and on the way to the devotional, I got a call from my sister and her ten-year-old daughter. My niece wanted to share with me her notes from the fireside they had attended--she loved it, and not only because she got two bowls of ice cream! :P I was impressed with her notes, and her thoughts on the fireside. I love that she wanted to share them with me, too. It makes me feel like maybe I've done something right.

...Adam has not been far from my thoughts, especially today, and that's ok. It's ok to miss him. It's ok to be sad. I'm still going to work to do and become who I need to become. I will trust that one day I will find someone I can love, who loves me, too. In the meantime, I'm going to try harder to focus on my blessings.

Blessings:
Awesome family!
Beautiful mountains
SNOW!
knowledge and testimony of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ
A great little ward choir that I get to sing with
Music
Memories
Journals, and the ability to write in them
Hugs. I need them, but I feel the love from my Heavenly Father...so it's almost as good. ;)
Camera to take pictures
Dryer to make my clothes warm before I put them on--my room is an arctic tundra, and the maintenance guys didn't come to try and fix it.
Temples!

...I want to go back to Boise. I need a job first, though. But hopefully it won't be too long before I can go again.